Thursday, May 5, 2016

Mom! Mom! Mom!

Mama; mama; mama; mama. My daughter kept repeating the same name and getting no response, which is a shame because my wife was only a room away. Seems sad, doesn't it? And it is. But not for any of the reasons that you probably think.

Because while she was saying mama, she actually wanted me. She was looking right at me, in fact.

Mama; mama; mama; mama.

If it was a one-off thing, I'd probably chalk it up to a mistake. Heck, I'll run through each of my kids' names before landing on the one I want sometimes.

Sadly, its not; a one-off thing, that is.

Sadie is notorious for loving when her family is "close." I love that about her. But its one thing to miss Mom; I get that. Look sweetie, I miss Mom too. I should mention Mom is around every weekend all weekend long and for long periods pretty much every day. I'd wager a guess my kids see both their parents more than most kids see a parent who works.

Ingrates

What gets me is that the minute I correct her in the absence of her Mom or get the littlest bit angry, she immediately breaks down and starts screaming "I miss my Mommy!"

When Rand broke his foot recently his mom was the only comfort he wanted. He didn't want comforting words from me or hugs or cuddles. Which again, if it was only this one instance I might chalk up to some kind of genetic mothering thing.

But this is a kid who kisses his mom goodnight every night, but for the longest time only kissed me every other night. I've seen broken through and been granted the every night treatment as well, but that stings a Dad's ego, you know.

Are these the worst indignities ever? No. Of course not. But because I work from home I'm the one who does most of the bathing, food prep/planning and single care of the damn kids. I'm sure it sucks for stay-at-home Moms who have to shoulder most of the childcare. But at least they get to be the first in line for love.

Not us Dads - or me, at least - nope, I get the stay-at-home Dad shoulder burdens while also being second fiddle.

Ingrates.

Speaking of young people doing really surprising things that you can't help but love... for better or for worse I've had Justin Bieber's Love Yourself song stuck in my head for days. Seriously, you can't avoid it on most any station that plays anything resembling pop music.

And it is catchy. Which kinds of sucks, because I really want to dislike Justin Bieber for all the reasons everyone else hates him. For his sheer Bieberness, his youth, his popularity and all that Bieliber stuff. And because of course my wife saw how good the song was WAY before I did. And I really don't want to admit she was spot on. But of course she was; because she always is. Its a little exhausting being married to someone so awesome, but that is a different story for a different time. She really is awesome.

Any way, like most people I love to make my own words up to songs. Its how probably how "poopie eyes" ended up being a few of my kids' first choice words. Anyway, I've had this song stuck in my head for days, and it conspired with current events to create this Weird Al type (seriously kids, look him up, he is pretty famous and good at what he does) song. So I'll just leave it right here for you:

Your mama loves you but she can't be here all the time
And I know that I can be difficult,
Because I never like to admit that I was wrong

But if you think that I'm hiding your toy
You should go and look t yourself
'Cause its literally right beside you


Oh, baby, you should go and look yourself

And I know I've been so caught up in my "adult stuff,"
I didn't see who hit who,
But one thing I know,
You're better sleeping on your own
So get back to bed and be quiet

Cause if you think that I'm hiding your toy
You should go and look yourself
'Cause its literally right beside you
Oh, baby, you should go and look yourself

And when you told me that you hated my dinner
The only problem was with you and not it
And every time you told me my rules were wrong
Did you forget that you are 4 and not the boss


Cause if you think that I'm hiding your toy
You should go and look yourself
'Cause its literally right beside you
Oh, baby, you should go and look yourself

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