Skip to main content

The British Invasion

The British are coming. In fact, they have already arrived. And this time around, there is no Paul Revere to sound the alarm. Because they are insidiously putting down roots inside our brains. Like some kind of zombie fungus.

I'm not sure who that sixth person on "our" side is, but he is in BAD shape.
First they come for words; then the horses.
It all started the other day when my daughter asked if we had any tomatoes. Not tomAtos, but tomatos. Soft "a" sound, not a hard one. Then she asked me to "mend" her toy. Who says that? You know who? The British. These are clearly British phrases. What would make otherwise perfectly American children speak with a British tongue? Where is this coming from?

Peppa Pig, that is where.

The entire Pig family is British. The speak British. They go on "holiday" rather than vacation. They call the stripped animal from Africa a zebra - soft "e" sound, not a hard one - rather than zEbra, like everyone else whose brain isn't half fungus.

That might not seem like a big deal. "Mend" is a completely understandable term for "fix," after all. But explore the show a little further and you'll realize just how insidious this society is.

If you watch the show for more than five minutes, you'll notice a trend. There is Peppa Pig. Zoe Zebra. Rebecca Rabbit. Richard Rabbit. Rosie Rabbit. Robbie Rabbit. Suzy Sheep. Candy Cat. Danny Dog. Pedro Pony. Emily Elephant. Edmond Elephant. Delphine Donkey. Freddy Fox. Kylie Kangaroo. Gabrielle Goat.

This is a horrible society where your first name apparently must share a first letter with the first letter of your last name. Good luck if you happen to be the 101st Donkey born. I'm guessing you get a name like Dtlaksdette, or they simply kill you in your crib to prevent such a tragic name.

Talk about totalitarian.




Comments

  1. Hmmm...one of your kids is covered on the name thing.

    Also, for reasons unknown to me, I (naturally) used (some) British spellings and punctuation until college when I realize it was a problem and what I was doing. Before I thought I just couldn't get the hang of spelling judgement and acknowledgement. So obviously this runs in the family :D

    ReplyDelete
  2. Interesting. Not too long ago I had a writer reach out to me for insights and quotes for a magazine article. It all fell apart when she and I realized that it was about parenting in the UK.

    Apparently my Tweet line and blog read British, even to British speaking people!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Meditations

A couple months ago I posted about a push up challenge, and at the risk of pushing this blog into a self-help section, I'm going to post something else that I really enjoy that I think might help a reader or two (all two of you!).

Lifehacker.com currently runs what it calls "Mid-Week Meditations," which is a short story on some piece of ancient wisdom.  Oooohhhhhhh, its ancient.  Just so you know, I'm not one to fall for the whole "ancient" is best meme.

But this is legit good stuff.  They take a quote or concept from a philosopher in the past - think Marcus Aurelius - translate what the sometimes mumbo jumboish phrase means, and then kind of detail how you can apply it.

This week, its all about how to train your mind for constructive thinking.

One thing I love about the series is that it doesn't dress up the knowledge too much.  It doesn't make it out to be more than it is, or suggest that its great simply because some Greek guy said it 2,000 years …

The Dark Months

The holidays are over.  It only seems like life is over.

There is a solid three month period where holidays of various degrees are hitting you one-two-three style.  You have Halloween, which takes some of the sting out of the cooling temperatures and the disappearance of summer.  You have Thanksgiving, with rare foods and the promise of Christmas. 

Then you have a month of prepping and joy for Christmas.  You are so busy, you hardly notice how cold it has gotten.  And this year it got pretty darn cold.  And then Christmas itself.  My wife and I take a week off between Christmas and New Years, so we have that. 

Its a period so full of life.  And then the aforementioned NYE - when the cold decided to take it up a notch.

With triplets, its a little like being shot out of a cannon and taking three months to land.

But when you land, you land firmly in what I call the Dark Months.

There are no more holidays.  Yes, I realize MLK and Presidents Day are in January and February, and yes, I know…

Stop Telling Kids They Are Perfect The Way They Are

Parenting is super tricky.

You do a thing you think is great - look, I've set very strict guidelines that will make my kid a super adult and prepare them for the world - and all you do is instill them with the thought that you never let them have fun and kept them from being able to adjust to the world as it is.
OTOH, you give them no rules and be their friend, and they long for you to have given them direction and guidance and pushed them so that they didn't end up with no skills and a habit of laying around on a couch all day.
It is really the ultimate no win situation in a game that feels incredibly important to win.  As a result, I'm hesitant to give hard and fast advice on how to parent a specific child.
But there is one piece thing I think we parents need to stop doing across the board: stop telling kids they are "perfect the way they are."  
This is also a tricky, mine filled field to traipse through, because honestly, self esteem requires that we like who…