One of the posters said that the divorce rate for parents of multiples is something on the order of 80 percent. Could 8-in-10 marriages involving multiples really end in divorce? The number seems simultaneously impossibly high and entirely legitimate.
|Eight out of ten.|
So what have I done? Well, getting back to the title of this post: I've let the happy out.
What exactly does that mean? It is kind of tough to explain, because its more a state of mind. I would say that its living in the moment. As the Philadelphia Eagles' Chip Kelly says: Be where your feet are. In other words, be present and create a world you want to live in moment to moment. Except that its almost more like doing anything but living in the moment. I'm almost living above the moment.
As you go through life, you have to remember that at one time, everything was exciting. Kids are great this way, because you get to see the world through fresh eyes. Remember when exercise was fun, because it wasn't exercise? Remember running, just to run, and not because you were late or because you had to lose that last 5 pounds? Remember when everything was fresh and exciting? It still is, we have just locked the happiness up. Sure, a pencil is just a pencil. But do you know realize just how much of a miracle it is that a pencil even exists? As we age, as we become adults and get lost in adulthood, sometimes we forget the "common" miracles all around us.
I remember the joy of childhood and I think I know what happened to that feeling. Life is simultaneously very short and a very long slog. I like to repeat the following mantra: the days are long and the years are short, which I stole from The Happiness Project's Gretchen Rubin. Sometimes it feels like the kids' bedtime will never come, and yet, you wake up and they are 3.5 and you wonder what happened. In all the stress and mundane humdrum of adult life, you lock the happiness up. Maybe because happiness isn't exactly an exalted position in society. Happiness is equated with being dense. The happy idiot. Ignorance is bliss. Forrest Gump. But I reject all this. I'm letting the happy out.
I like to think we are all super heroes, locked in combat with the muddling, sometimes mundane issues of our lives in our own ways. It is heroic to apply what we have learned and know to form our lives and make them the best we can. Its the accumulation of that knowledge and its application that life is all about. What could make you more of a super hero than the cosmic battle against the dying of the light we held in our eyes and hearts as children?
Sure, you might not have a villain like The Joker to battle against, but the battle against the mundane, the battle against the dying of the light, that is as real an enemy as any super criminal.
Let me try to bring this all back together into one complete, sensible package. I guess what I'm saying is that, sometimes you have to break out of that routine and protect that light. You have to realize that, regardless of how overwhelmed or tired you feel, at one time you loved the hustle and bustle and the very living of life. That thing your wife/husband does that now drives you nuts? At one time you loved it, appreciated it, or at the very least tolerated it. What changed? Nothing really. Maybe you matured, but have you let the light die, even a little? The happiness is still there, tucked deep down in its cove, waiting to be let out. All you have to do to rescue it is recognize that it is there and let it out.
So let the happy out. Go out and be a super hero. And be sure to comment and let me know how you are a super hero.